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							- September 2007In high school I decided I was going to study philosophy in college.
 
- I had several motives, some more honorable than others.  One of the
 
- less honorable was to shock people.  College was regarded as job
 
- training where I grew up, so studying philosophy seemed an impressively
 
- impractical thing to do.  Sort of like slashing holes in your clothes
 
- or putting a safety pin through your ear, which were other forms
 
- of impressive impracticality then just coming into fashion.But I had some more honest motives as well.  I thought studying
 
- philosophy would be a shortcut straight to wisdom.  All the people
 
- majoring in other things would just end up with a bunch of domain
 
- knowledge.  I would be learning what was really what.I'd tried to read a few philosophy books.  Not recent ones; you
 
- wouldn't find those in our high school library.  But I tried to
 
- read Plato and Aristotle.  I doubt I believed I understood them,
 
- but they sounded like they were talking about something important.
 
- I assumed I'd learn what in college.The summer before senior year I took some college classes.  I learned
 
- a lot in the calculus class, but I didn't learn much in Philosophy
 
- 101.  And yet my plan to study philosophy remained intact.  It was
 
- my fault I hadn't learned anything.  I hadn't read the books we
 
- were assigned carefully enough.  I'd give Berkeley's Principles
 
- of Human Knowledge another shot in college.  Anything so admired
 
- and so difficult to read must have something in it, if one could
 
- only figure out what.Twenty-six years later, I still don't understand Berkeley.  I have
 
- a nice edition of his collected works.  Will I ever read it?  Seems
 
- unlikely.The difference between then and now is that now I understand why
 
- Berkeley is probably not worth trying to understand.  I think I see
 
- now what went wrong with philosophy, and how we might fix it.WordsI did end up being a philosophy major for most of college.  It
 
- didn't work out as I'd hoped.  I didn't learn any magical truths
 
- compared to which everything else was mere domain knowledge.  But
 
- I do at least know now why I didn't.  Philosophy doesn't really
 
- have a subject matter in the way math or history or most other
 
- university subjects do.  There is no core of knowledge one must
 
- master.  The closest you come to that is a knowledge of what various
 
- individual philosophers have said about different topics over the
 
- years.  Few were sufficiently correct that people have forgotten
 
- who discovered what they discovered.Formal logic has some subject matter. I took several classes in
 
- logic.  I don't know if I learned anything from them.
 
- [1]
 
- It does seem to me very important to be able to flip ideas around in
 
- one's head: to see when two ideas don't fully cover the space of
 
- possibilities, or when one idea is the same as another but with a
 
- couple things changed.  But did studying logic teach me the importance
 
- of thinking this way, or make me any better at it?  I don't know.There are things I know I learned from studying philosophy.  The
 
- most dramatic I learned immediately, in the first semester of
 
- freshman year, in a class taught by Sydney Shoemaker.  I learned
 
- that I don't exist.  I am (and you are) a collection of cells that
 
- lurches around driven by various forces, and calls itself I.  But
 
- there's no central, indivisible thing that your identity goes with.
 
- You could conceivably lose half your brain and live.  Which means
 
- your brain could conceivably be split into two halves and each
 
- transplanted into different bodies.  Imagine waking up after such
 
- an operation.  You have to imagine being two people.The real lesson here is that the concepts we use in everyday life
 
- are fuzzy, and break down if pushed too hard.  Even a concept as
 
- dear to us as I.  It took me a while to grasp this, but when I
 
- did it was fairly sudden, like someone in the nineteenth century
 
- grasping evolution and realizing the story of creation they'd been
 
- told as a child was all wrong. 
 
- [2]
 
- Outside of math there's a limit
 
- to how far you can push words; in fact, it would not be a bad
 
- definition of math to call it the study of terms that have precise
 
- meanings.  Everyday words are inherently imprecise.  They work well
 
- enough in everyday life that you don't notice.  Words seem to work,
 
- just as Newtonian physics seems to.  But you can always make them
 
- break if you push them far enough.I would say that this has been, unfortunately for philosophy, the
 
- central fact of philosophy.  Most philosophical debates are not
 
- merely afflicted by but driven by confusions over words.  Do we
 
- have free will?  Depends what you mean by "free." Do abstract ideas
 
- exist?  Depends what you mean by "exist."Wittgenstein is popularly credited with the idea that most philosophical
 
- controversies are due to confusions over language.  I'm not sure
 
- how much credit to give him.  I suspect a lot of people realized
 
- this, but reacted simply by not studying philosophy, rather than
 
- becoming philosophy professors.How did things get this way?  Can something people have spent
 
- thousands of years studying really be a waste of time?  Those are
 
- interesting questions.  In fact, some of the most interesting
 
- questions you can ask about philosophy.  The most valuable way to
 
- approach the current philosophical tradition may be neither to get
 
- lost in pointless speculations like Berkeley, nor to shut them down
 
- like Wittgenstein, but to study it as an example of reason gone
 
- wrong.HistoryWestern philosophy really begins with Socrates, Plato, and Aristotle.
 
- What we know of their predecessors comes from fragments and references
 
- in later works; their doctrines could be described as speculative
 
- cosmology that occasionally strays into analysis.  Presumably they
 
- were driven by whatever makes people in every other society invent
 
- cosmologies.
 
- [3]With Socrates, Plato, and particularly Aristotle, this tradition
 
- turned a corner.  There started to be a lot more analysis.  I suspect
 
- Plato and Aristotle were encouraged in this by progress in math.
 
- Mathematicians had by then shown that you could figure things out
 
- in a much more conclusive way than by making up fine sounding stories
 
- about them.  
 
- [4]People talk so much about abstractions now that we don't realize
 
- what a leap it must have been when they first started to.  It was
 
- presumably many thousands of years between when people first started
 
- describing things as hot or cold and when someone asked "what is
 
- heat?"  No doubt it was a very gradual process.  We don't know if
 
- Plato or Aristotle were the first to ask any of the questions they
 
- did.  But their works are the oldest we have that do this on a large
 
- scale, and there is a freshness (not to say naivete) about them
 
- that suggests some of the questions they asked were new to them,
 
- at least.Aristotle in particular reminds me of the phenomenon that happens
 
- when people discover something new, and are so excited by it that
 
- they race through a huge percentage of the newly discovered territory
 
- in one lifetime.  If so, that's evidence of how new this kind of
 
- thinking was. 
 
- [5]This is all to explain how Plato and Aristotle can be very impressive
 
- and yet naive and mistaken.  It was impressive even to ask the
 
- questions they did.  That doesn't mean they always came up with
 
- good answers.  It's not considered insulting to say that ancient
 
- Greek mathematicians were naive in some respects, or at least lacked
 
- some concepts that would have made their lives easier.  So I hope
 
- people will not be too offended if I propose that ancient philosophers
 
- were similarly naive.  In particular, they don't seem to have fully
 
- grasped what I earlier called the central fact of philosophy: that
 
- words break if you push them too far."Much to the surprise of the builders of the first digital computers,"
 
- Rod Brooks wrote, "programs written for them usually did not work."
 
- [6]
 
- Something similar happened when people first started trying
 
- to talk about abstractions.  Much to their surprise, they didn't
 
- arrive at answers they agreed upon.  In fact, they rarely seemed
 
- to arrive at answers at all.They were in effect arguing about artifacts induced by sampling at
 
- too low a resolution.The proof of how useless some of their answers turned out to be is
 
- how little effect they have.  No one after reading Aristotle's
 
- Metaphysics does anything differently as a result.
 
- [7]Surely I'm not claiming that ideas have to have practical applications
 
- to be interesting?  No, they may not have to.  Hardy's boast that
 
- number theory had no use whatsoever wouldn't disqualify it.  But
 
- he turned out to be mistaken.  In fact, it's suspiciously hard to
 
- find a field of math that truly has no practical use.  And Aristotle's
 
- explanation of the ultimate goal of philosophy in Book A of the
 
- Metaphysics implies that philosophy should be useful too.Theoretical KnowledgeAristotle's goal was to find the most general of general principles.
 
- The examples he gives are convincing: an ordinary worker builds
 
- things a certain way out of habit; a master craftsman can do more
 
- because he grasps the underlying principles.  The trend is clear:
 
- the more general the knowledge, the more admirable it is.  But then
 
- he makes a mistake—possibly the most important mistake in the
 
- history of philosophy.  He has noticed that theoretical knowledge
 
- is often acquired for its own sake, out of curiosity, rather than
 
- for any practical need.  So he proposes there are two kinds of
 
- theoretical knowledge: some that's useful in practical matters and
 
- some that isn't.  Since people interested in the latter are interested
 
- in it for its own sake, it must be more noble.  So he sets as his
 
- goal in the Metaphysics the exploration of knowledge that has no
 
- practical use.  Which means no alarms go off when he takes on grand
 
- but vaguely understood questions and ends up getting lost in a sea
 
- of words.His mistake was to confuse motive and result.  Certainly, people
 
- who want a deep understanding of something are often driven by
 
- curiosity rather than any practical need.  But that doesn't mean
 
- what they end up learning is useless.  It's very valuable in practice
 
- to have a deep understanding of what you're doing; even if you're
 
- never called on to solve advanced problems, you can see shortcuts
 
- in the solution of simple ones, and your knowledge won't break down
 
- in edge cases, as it would if you were relying on formulas you
 
- didn't understand.  Knowledge is power.  That's what makes theoretical
 
- knowledge prestigious.  It's also what causes smart people to be
 
- curious about certain things and not others; our DNA is not so
 
- disinterested as we might think.So while ideas don't have to have immediate practical applications
 
- to be interesting, the kinds of things we find interesting will
 
- surprisingly often turn out to have practical applications.The reason Aristotle didn't get anywhere in the Metaphysics was
 
- partly that he set off with contradictory aims: to explore the most
 
- abstract ideas, guided by the assumption that they were useless.
 
- He was like an explorer looking for a territory to the north of
 
- him, starting with the assumption that it was located to the south.And since his work became the map used by generations of future
 
- explorers, he sent them off in the wrong direction as well. 
 
- [8]
 
- Perhaps worst of all, he protected them from both the criticism of
 
- outsiders and the promptings of their own inner compass by establishing
 
- the principle that the most noble sort of theoretical knowledge had
 
- to be useless.The Metaphysics is mostly a failed experiment.  A few ideas from
 
- it turned out to be worth keeping; the bulk of it has had no effect
 
- at all.  The Metaphysics is among the least read of all famous
 
- books.  It's not hard to understand the way Newton's Principia
 
- is, but the way a garbled message is.Arguably it's an interesting failed experiment.  But unfortunately
 
- that was not the conclusion Aristotle's successors derived from
 
- works like the Metaphysics. 
 
- [9]
 
- Soon after, the western world
 
- fell on intellectual hard times.  Instead of version 1s to be
 
- superseded, the works of Plato and Aristotle became revered texts
 
- to be mastered and discussed.  And so things remained for a shockingly
 
- long time.  It was not till around 1600 (in Europe, where the center
 
- of gravity had shifted by then) that one found people confident
 
- enough to treat Aristotle's work as a catalog of mistakes.  And
 
- even then they rarely said so outright.If it seems surprising that the gap was so long, consider how little
 
- progress there was in math between Hellenistic times and the
 
- Renaissance.In the intervening years an unfortunate idea took hold:  that it
 
- was not only acceptable to produce works like the Metaphysics,
 
- but that it was a particularly prestigious line of work, done by a
 
- class of people called philosophers.  No one thought to go back and
 
- debug Aristotle's motivating argument.  And so instead of correcting
 
- the problem Aristotle discovered by falling into it—that you can
 
- easily get lost if you talk too loosely about very abstract ideas—they 
 
- continued to fall into it.The SingularityCuriously, however, the works they produced continued to attract
 
- new readers.  Traditional philosophy occupies a kind of singularity
 
- in this respect.  If you write in an unclear way about big ideas,
 
- you produce something that seems tantalizingly attractive to
 
- inexperienced but intellectually ambitious students.  Till one knows
 
- better, it's hard to distinguish something that's hard to understand
 
- because the writer was unclear in his own mind from something like
 
- a mathematical proof that's hard to understand because the ideas
 
- it represents are hard to understand.  To someone who hasn't learned
 
- the difference, traditional philosophy seems extremely attractive:
 
- as hard (and therefore impressive) as math, yet broader in scope.
 
- That was what lured me in as a high school student.This singularity is even more singular in having its own defense
 
- built in.  When things are hard to understand, people who suspect
 
- they're nonsense generally keep quiet.  There's no way to prove a
 
- text is meaningless.  The closest you can get is to show that the
 
- official judges of some class of texts can't distinguish them from
 
- placebos. 
 
- [10]And so instead of denouncing philosophy, most people who suspected
 
- it was a waste of time just studied other things.  That alone is
 
- fairly damning evidence, considering philosophy's claims.  It's
 
- supposed to be about the ultimate truths. Surely all smart people
 
- would be interested in it, if it delivered on that promise.Because philosophy's flaws turned away the sort of people who might
 
- have corrected them, they tended to be self-perpetuating.  Bertrand
 
- Russell wrote in a letter in 1912:
 
-   Hitherto the people attracted to philosophy have been mostly those
 
-   who loved the big generalizations, which were all wrong, so that
 
-   few people with exact minds have taken up the subject.
 
- [11]
 
- His response was to launch Wittgenstein at it, with dramatic results.I think Wittgenstein deserves to be famous not for the discovery
 
- that most previous philosophy was a waste of time, which judging
 
- from the circumstantial evidence must have been made by every smart
 
- person who studied a little philosophy and declined to pursue it
 
- further, but for how he acted in response.
 
- [12]
 
- Instead of quietly
 
- switching to another field, he made a fuss, from inside.  He was
 
- Gorbachev.The field of philosophy is still shaken from the fright Wittgenstein
 
- gave it. 
 
- [13]
 
- Later in life he spent a lot of time talking about
 
- how words worked.  Since that seems to be allowed, that's what a
 
- lot of philosophers do now.  Meanwhile, sensing a vacuum in the
 
- metaphysical speculation department, the people who used to do
 
- literary criticism have been edging Kantward, under new names like
 
- "literary theory," "critical theory," and when they're feeling
 
- ambitious, plain "theory."  The writing is the familiar word salad:
 
-   Gender is not like some of the other grammatical modes which
 
-   express precisely a mode of conception without any reality that
 
-   corresponds to the conceptual mode, and consequently do not express
 
-   precisely something in reality by which the intellect could be
 
-   moved to conceive a thing the way it does, even where that motive
 
-   is not something in the thing as such.
 
-   [14]
 
- The singularity I've described is not going away.  There's a market
 
- for writing that sounds impressive and can't be disproven. There
 
- will always be both supply and demand.  So if one group abandons
 
- this territory, there will always be others ready to occupy it.A ProposalWe may be able to do better.  Here's an intriguing possibility.
 
- Perhaps we should do what Aristotle meant to do, instead of what
 
- he did.  The goal he announces in the Metaphysics seems one worth
 
- pursuing: to discover the most general truths.  That sounds good.
 
- But instead of trying to discover them because they're useless,
 
- let's try to discover them because they're useful.I propose we try again, but that we use that heretofore despised
 
- criterion, applicability, as a guide to keep us from wondering
 
- off into a swamp of abstractions.  Instead of trying to answer the
 
- question:
 
-   What are the most general truths?
 
- let's try to answer the question
 
-   Of all the useful things we can say, which are the most general?
 
- The test of utility I propose is whether we cause people who read
 
- what we've written to do anything differently afterward.  Knowing
 
- we have to give definite (if implicit) advice will keep us from
 
- straying beyond the resolution of the words we're using.The goal is the same as Aristotle's; we just approach it from a
 
- different direction.As an example of a useful, general idea, consider that of the
 
- controlled experiment.  There's an idea that has turned out to be
 
- widely applicable.  Some might say it's part of science, but it's
 
- not part of any specific science; it's literally meta-physics (in
 
- our sense of "meta").   The idea of evolution is another. It turns
 
- out to have quite broad applications—for example, in genetic
 
- algorithms and even product design.  Frankfurt's distinction between
 
- lying and bullshitting seems a promising recent example.
 
- [15]These seem to me what philosophy should look like: quite general
 
- observations that would cause someone who understood them to do
 
- something differently.Such observations will necessarily be about things that are imprecisely
 
- defined.  Once you start using words with precise meanings, you're
 
- doing math.  So starting from utility won't entirely solve the
 
- problem I described above—it won't flush out the metaphysical
 
- singularity.  But it should help.  It gives people with good
 
- intentions a new roadmap into abstraction.  And they may thereby
 
- produce things that make the writing of the people with bad intentions
 
- look bad by comparison.One drawback of this approach is that it won't produce the sort of
 
- writing that gets you tenure.  And not just because it's not currently
 
- the fashion.  In order to get tenure in any field you must not
 
- arrive at conclusions that members of tenure committees can disagree
 
- with.  In practice there are two kinds of solutions to this problem.
 
- In math and the sciences, you can prove what you're saying, or at
 
- any rate adjust your conclusions so you're not claiming anything
 
- false ("6 of 8 subjects had lower blood pressure after the treatment").
 
- In the humanities you can either avoid drawing any definite conclusions
 
- (e.g. conclude that an issue is a complex one), or draw conclusions
 
- so narrow that no one cares enough to disagree with you.The kind of philosophy I'm advocating won't be able to take either
 
- of these routes.  At best you'll be able to achieve the essayist's
 
- standard of proof, not the mathematician's or the experimentalist's.
 
- And yet you won't be able to meet the usefulness test without
 
- implying definite and fairly broadly applicable conclusions.  Worse
 
- still, the usefulness test will tend to produce results that annoy
 
- people: there's no use in telling people things they already believe,
 
- and people are often upset to be told things they don't.Here's the exciting thing, though.  Anyone can do this.  Getting
 
- to general plus useful by starting with useful and cranking up the
 
- generality may be unsuitable for junior professors trying to get
 
- tenure, but it's better for everyone else, including professors who
 
- already have it.  This side of the mountain is a nice gradual slope.
 
- You can start by writing things that are useful but very specific,
 
- and then gradually make them more general.  Joe's has good burritos.
 
- What makes a good burrito?  What makes good food?  What makes
 
- anything good?  You can take as long as you want.  You don't have
 
- to get all the way to the top of the mountain.  You don't have to
 
- tell anyone you're doing philosophy.If it seems like a daunting task to do philosophy, here's an
 
- encouraging thought.  The field is a lot younger than it seems.
 
- Though the first philosophers in the western tradition lived about
 
- 2500 years ago, it would be misleading to say the field is 2500
 
- years old, because for most of that time the leading practitioners
 
- weren't doing much more than writing commentaries on Plato or
 
- Aristotle while watching over their shoulders for the next invading
 
- army.  In the times when they weren't, philosophy was hopelessly
 
- intermingled with religion.  It didn't shake itself free till a
 
- couple hundred years ago, and even then was afflicted by the
 
- structural problems I've described above.  If I say this, some will
 
- say it's a ridiculously overbroad and uncharitable generalization,
 
- and others will say it's old news, but here goes: judging from their
 
- works, most philosophers up to the present have been wasting their
 
- time.  So in a sense the field is still at the first step. 
 
- [16]That sounds a preposterous claim to make.  It won't seem so
 
- preposterous in 10,000 years.  Civilization always seems old, because
 
- it's always the oldest it's ever been.  The only way to say whether
 
- something is really old or not is by looking at structural evidence,
 
- and structurally philosophy is young; it's still reeling from the
 
- unexpected breakdown of words.Philosophy is as young now as math was in 1500.  There is a lot
 
- more to discover.Notes
 
- [1]
 
- In practice formal logic is not much use, because despite
 
- some progress in the last 150 years we're still only able to formalize
 
- a small percentage of statements.  We may never do that much better,
 
- for the same reason 1980s-style "knowledge representation" could
 
- never have worked; many statements may have no representation more
 
- concise than a huge, analog brain state.[2]
 
- It was harder for Darwin's contemporaries to grasp this than
 
- we can easily imagine.  The story of creation in the Bible is not
 
- just a Judeo-Christian concept; it's roughly what everyone must
 
- have believed since before people were people.  The hard part of
 
- grasping evolution was to realize that species weren't, as they
 
- seem to be, unchanging, but had instead evolved from different,
 
- simpler organisms over unimaginably long periods of time.Now we don't have to make that leap.  No one in an industrialized
 
- country encounters the idea of evolution for the first time as an
 
- adult.  Everyone's taught about it as a child, either as truth or
 
- heresy.[3]
 
- Greek philosophers before Plato wrote in verse.  This must
 
- have affected what they said.  If you try to write about the nature
 
- of the world in verse, it inevitably turns into incantation.  Prose
 
- lets you be more precise, and more tentative.[4]
 
- Philosophy is like math's
 
- ne'er-do-well brother.  It was born when Plato and Aristotle looked
 
- at the works of their predecessors and said in effect "why can't
 
- you be more like your brother?"  Russell was still saying the same
 
- thing 2300 years later.Math is the precise half of the most abstract ideas, and philosophy
 
- the imprecise half.  It's probably inevitable that philosophy will
 
- suffer by comparison, because there's no lower bound to its precision.
 
- Bad math is merely boring, whereas bad philosophy is nonsense.  And
 
- yet there are some good ideas in the imprecise half.[5]
 
- Aristotle's best work was in logic and zoology, both of which
 
- he can  be said to have invented.  But the most dramatic departure
 
- from his predecessors was a new, much more analytical style of
 
- thinking.  He was arguably the first scientist.[6]
 
- Brooks, Rodney, Programming in Common Lisp, Wiley, 1985, p.
 
- 94.[7]
 
- Some would say we depend on Aristotle more than we realize,
 
- because his ideas were one of the ingredients in our common culture.
 
- Certainly a lot of the words we use have a connection with Aristotle,
 
- but it seems a bit much to suggest that we wouldn't have the concept
 
- of the essence of something or the distinction between matter and
 
- form if Aristotle hadn't written about them.One way to see how much we really depend on Aristotle would be to
 
- diff European culture with Chinese: what ideas did European culture
 
- have in 1800 that Chinese culture didn't, in virtue of Aristotle's
 
- contribution?[8]
 
- The meaning of the word "philosophy" has changed over time.
 
- In ancient times it covered a broad range of topics, comparable in
 
- scope to our "scholarship" (though without the methodological
 
- implications).  Even as late as Newton's time it included what we
 
- now call "science."  But core of the subject today is still what
 
- seemed to Aristotle the core: the attempt to discover the most
 
- general truths.Aristotle didn't call this "metaphysics."  That name got assigned
 
- to it because the books we now call the Metaphysics came after
 
- (meta = after) the Physics in the standard edition of Aristotle's
 
- works compiled by Andronicus of Rhodes three centuries later.  What
 
- we call "metaphysics" Aristotle called "first philosophy."[9]
 
- Some of Aristotle's immediate successors may have realized
 
- this, but it's hard to say because most of their works are lost.[10]
 
- Sokal, Alan, "Transgressing the Boundaries: Toward a Transformative
 
- Hermeneutics of Quantum Gravity," Social Text 46/47, pp. 217-252.Abstract-sounding nonsense seems to be most attractive when it's
 
- aligned with some axe the audience already has to grind.  If this
 
- is so we should find it's most popular with groups that are (or
 
- feel) weak.  The powerful don't need its reassurance.[11]
 
- Letter to Ottoline Morrell, December 1912.  Quoted in:Monk, Ray, Ludwig Wittgenstein: The Duty of Genius, Penguin, 1991,
 
- p. 75.[12]
 
- A preliminary result, that all metaphysics between Aristotle
 
- and 1783 had been a waste of time, is due to I. Kant.[13]
 
- Wittgenstein asserted a sort of mastery to which the inhabitants
 
- of early 20th century Cambridge seem to have been peculiarly
 
- vulnerable—perhaps partly because so many had been raised religious
 
- and then stopped believing, so had a vacant space in their heads
 
- for someone to tell them what to do (others chose Marx or Cardinal
 
- Newman), and partly because a quiet, earnest place like Cambridge
 
- in that era had no natural immunity to messianic figures, just as
 
- European politics then had no natural immunity to dictators.[14]
 
- This is actually from the Ordinatio of Duns Scotus (ca.
 
- 1300), with "number" replaced by "gender."  Plus ca change.Wolter, Allan (trans), Duns Scotus: Philosophical Writings, Nelson,
 
- 1963, p. 92.[15]
 
- Frankfurt, Harry, On Bullshit,  Princeton University Press,
 
- 2005.[16]
 
- Some introductions to philosophy now take the line that
 
- philosophy is worth studying as a process rather than for any
 
- particular truths you'll learn.  The philosophers whose works they
 
- cover would be rolling in their graves at that.  They hoped they
 
- were doing more than serving as examples of how to argue: they hoped
 
- they were getting results.  Most were wrong, but it doesn't seem
 
- an impossible hope.This argument seems to me like someone in 1500 looking at the lack
 
- of results achieved by alchemy and saying its value was as a process.
 
- No, they were going about it wrong.  It turns out it is possible
 
- to transmute lead into gold (though not economically at current
 
- energy prices), but the route to that knowledge was to
 
- backtrack and try another approach.Thanks to Trevor Blackwell, Paul Buchheit, Jessica Livingston, 
 
- Robert Morris, Mark Nitzberg, and Peter Norvig for reading drafts of this.
 
 
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